Living with a Courageous Heart
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Anyone can slay a dragon, she told me, But try waking up every morning and loving the world all over again. That’s what takes a real hero.
These words are from Brian Andreas, creator of StoryPeople, and one of my very favorite authors. His words ring in my mind: “Anyone can slay a dragon, she told me…” Maybe “dragon” means fear, or challenge, or stressor. I’d like to believe that everyone can overcome the obstacles that happen on their journeys if they have the support they need. It may just be true that anyone can slay a dragon, that this is something we are all capable of doing.
But the part I really love in this quote is the image of waking up every morning and loving the world all over again. How often do we wake up wishing for another ten minutes of sleep, anxious about the test or report or call or whatever Hard Thing that we have to deal with that day, wondering how our money can make it through to the next deposit, worried about friends and loved ones who are ill?
What would our days be like if every day as we awoke our first thought was to love the world all over again? It is a choice, after all. Of course, if it were easy to follow through with this all day every day, the world would be a lot less challenging place for us and for spiritual growth. Loving the world all over again every day—that’s what takes a real hero.
When we think about the words “courage” and “hero,” we may not think of ourselves. We are the heroes of our own stories, though, and we may even have heroic moments in the stories of others. Seeing ourselves as heroes is a choice. Being courageous is also a choice: it is being afraid but doing—or not doing—something anyway. Fear is a required part of courage; if there is no fear, it isn’t courage.
Courage has many faces, but all of them share a truth: courage reveals our authentic self. Hemingway said that “Courage is grace under pressure.” Courage may not always be graceful, but it does let us see a part of ourselves that, without the act of confronting fears, we might not have otherwise seen or known. That pressure (whatever it is that we are confronting) creates situations in which we express who we are, who we know ourselves to be. Courage comes from somewhere deep within, calling us to be our best selves. Although we know that there may be painful consequences, courage calls us to do what we feel is the right thing, even if we are afraid—afraid of messing up, of saying the wrong thing, of the consequences, of being out of our comfort zones.
Courage is getting a heart disease diagnosis and deciding to change your diet and lifestyle, ultimately changing your life. Courage is taking your beloved pet to the vet for their final visit. Courage is applying for that dream job or to school and uprooting your life to make it work. Courage is walking into the room of a chronically angry, unappeasable patient to offer care again. Courage is reaching out to connect with that friend you lost touch with years ago. Courage is telling your two little girls that their father is going to die, and doing the things you promised him you would do. Courage is moving your mother, father, husband, sibling, child into assisted living or hospice because you can no longer take care of them yourself.
Courage is asking for help when you need it. Courage is looking again for hope where you don’t see any. Courage is singing, even off-key, but with your full voice at church. Courage is going in for that medical test or procedure. Courage is welcoming the stranger. Courage is saying, “I’m sorry, I messed up. Can you forgive me?” Courage is being human instead of trying to be perfect. Courage is admitting, “This is really hard and I don’t know what to do.” Courage is being willing to try new things and make mistakes. Courage is trusting ourselves. Courage is waking up every morning and choosing to bless the world.
Living with a courageous heart is an aspiration, an intention, a way to be with ourselves and the world. It is something we will fall short of—from time to time or often—because we are human, because sometimes our minds or bodies, our hearts or spirits will hurt. And that’s okay. There will be times that we will miss the mark. There will be those times when we aren’t everything we know we can be. We won’t have the energy, or feel we don’t have the courage to spare.
These will be the times when we allow others to be heroes, to live that part of our story with courageous hearts and so extend us grace. In that way, by being willing to be seen as our most vulnerable selves, we become courageous, and learn to love the world all over again.
Kristina is a member of the UU Church of Kent (in Kent, OH), where she served in a number of roles as a lay leader before answering the call to ministry. Her interests include: multigenerational worship; family ministry; sexuality education and reproductive justice; anti-racist, anti-oppressive, multicultural work; spiritual direction;and interfaith work. Kristina's other great passion is timebanking; she has been a coordinator of the Kent Community TimeBank for about four years and has learned a lot about creating community using timebank core values. Kristina is a graduate of Kent State University, married to her best friend, and loves being home with their five "furkids" (four cats and a Great Dane).
- Living with a Courageous Heart - March 1, 2015
