Pay Attention
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“Sit, Naomi, and pay attention!” This was my ongoing, never-ending command to my Soft Coated Wheaten Terrier. Naomi Jean was a very well behaved dog. In fact, she had passed all her obedience tests and was a certified Therapy Dog. Whatever commands I gave, she followed immediately, but I was never sure she was giving me her full attention.
Over the almost 25 years as a hospice and palliative care chaplain I have been blessed by my beloved patients with a profound lesson. It is that this beautiful world is laid out before us for our pleasure and joy. And, also for our despair and anguish. Whatever our frame of mind, the one thing we can always do is to stop and pay attention. Pay attention to the details of life, the small momentary miracles that propel us through our days.
I have a Unitarian Universalist theology of hope. And it is based on my belief that being present in this very moment is the way to peace. What I know for sure is that we are only promised the moment we are in, and that is enough. It is enough if we fully embrace it without distraction.
We as Unitarian Universalists are a product of a theology of hope. Our Universalist ancestors shared their hopeful theology when they preached that all people were loved by God and would never be abandoned by God. In the mid-20th century Unitarian Universalists defied segregation laws and accompanied our Black siblings on the road to voting rights in the setting of deep and deadly racism. A theology of hope in a situation that seemed unredeemable. And Unitarian Universalists all over this country marched and rolled and changed the law to make it legal for all people to marry the person they loved. And today, exhibiting a deep theology of hope, Unitarian Universalists around the nation are defying calls to “other” people who are different from us, are showing up to protest the murders by police of unarmed Black women and men, and who are taking the risk of being dragged of the streets by paramilitary police for protesting the sins of our government.
A theology of hope. How can we not be active and present in the world while we seek justice? Even in grief and pain. Even in despair. We have the opportunity to be in communion with each other and with the wider world to do the work of our faith. This theology of hope reminds me that I do not move alone in this world. We not only do not move alone, we move in the loving embrace of our religious community. That religious community of hope.
How can we not, in the middle of the 21st century, be lifted up and buoyed by these stories of our faith’s theology of hope?
My friends, living and believing in a theology of hope cannot be sustained without a deep faithfulness…without a faith journey and spiritual practice. Just ask Naomi.
As I stood in front of her in training class after training class, I would become more frustrated by the minute as Naomi looked around the room while I was frantically touching my nose and saying: “Naomi, pay attention.” She would sit, stay, heel, and do all the other commands, but never truly watching me. And then, one day it occurred to me. She was paying attention! Just not to me. She was taking in all the sights and sounds and smells around her, while continuing to do her job. She was paying attention to the most important things around her. Those things that are short lived but soul filling. Those things that brought her joy. She had a spiritual practice!
But, did I? Not so much. One day, as I was hustling off to my job as a hospital chaplain, driving down the road, I realized that I could not remember seeing my beautiful herb garden that morning. I was so shocked that I returned home to spend a minute in the beauty. I was devastated. My theology of hope is not sustainable on its own. It must be supported by a spiritual practice of paying attention to the beauty of the moment that the universe has given us. When we grasp onto our current experience of beauty and joy, and live it, feel it, celebrate it fully, we can survive the news of the day, the newest tragedy of the week, the outrage of the month.
In The Miracle of Mindfulness Thich Naht Hanh tells of watching a friend eat a tangerine. He says that his friend, Jim, began to talk about what they would be doing in the future. As he talked, he popped a piece of tangerine into his mouth, and before he had even begun to chew it, he had another piece ready to eat. Thich Nhat Hanh says it was as if he hadn’t been eating the tangerine at all. If anything, says Thich Nhat Hanh, he was “eating his future plans.” I am struck by how easy it is to be wrapped up in what has to be done next, in thoughts of being late for an appointment, in list making in my mind—all to the exclusion of what is going on right around me.
After that day in the garden I went back to my Native roots for a practice of mindfulness, a practice of paying attention. I remembered an old Indian ritual in which, when one rises in the morning, they go outside, face the east and offer gratitude. So simple, yet so profound. Now in the morning I too, along with many other Native people, go outside, look to the east and offer my gratitude. From there it is so easy to pay attention to the small and beautiful gifts of the day, which sustain me.
If you join me in a spiritual practice of your own, and a Unitarian Universalist theology of hope, you will, I am sure, find a deep and abiding peace. But that’s not all. You will also find a powerful strength and faith that will sustain you through grief and help you to make meaningful change in your corner of the world. I tell you this to remind you that, in this time of fear, worry, anxiety we have the opportunity to find grace and hope.
And so, as I would say to Naomi Jean, as I grasped her furry cheeks in my hands…PAY ATTENTION! And, obedient dog that she was, she did. Only not to me. To the world. To the present. To life’s gift of hope, joy, and the contentment that comes from truly knowing the place she was in.
She has served as a member of the UU Nominating Committee and on the Unitarian Universalist Women’s Federation board. She is the former President and Vice President of the Diverse and Revolutionary Unitarian Universalist Multicultural Ministries, and continues to serve DRUUMM as Chaplain.
Rev. Di Bona also serves on the Board of the Church of the Larger Fellowship. She is a Chaplain to the UUA Board of Trustees and Finding Our Way Home.
Danielle identifies as bi-racial. Her father was born in Italy and came to the United States when he was 7. Her mother was Wampanoag, a tribe that has lived on the south shore of Massachusetts for thousands of years.
When not serving the UUA, the church and the community, Danielle describes herself as “retired.” In her retirement she trains and shows her dogs and had the honor of showing Rozi and Aldas at the National Dog Show in Philadelphia and Westminster in Manhattan.
- Pay Attention - October 1, 2020
