What is Hannukah?
Goal:
To learn about the origins of Hannukah.
Preparation:
Read Background
Materials:
Dreidel pattern
Poster board
Markers, crayons
Scissors
Peanuts and raisins
Activities:
1. Read “A Great Miracle”
2. Make dreidels:
Trace the dreidel pattern on poster board, color and cut out.
Glue or tape dreidels together, fitting the small rolled-up turners into the tops to enable them to spin. Make enough for everyone to have his or her own dreidel.
Pass out an equal number of raisins and peanuts to each player.
3. Play the dreidel game using the following rules:
Each player puts one peanut or raisin in the center. Then the first player spins the dreidel. If it lands on:
Nun—the player does nothing
Gimmel—the player takes everything in the center
Hey—the player takes half
Shin—the player puts one item in
Before the next player spins, everyone puts another piece in the center.
Children, Money and Values: Ten Principles
“How come you won’t get me the latest video game?”
“Gimme, get me, I want it, I saw it on T. V.”
“Amanda gets double what I get as an allowance!”
“I’m the only one in my class whose parents are tightwads. Just because you think this simple lifestyle stuff is cool, doesn’t mean I want it!”
“We tried to share our value of a simple lifestyle with our children, but some resented never having what other kids had, and now they’re typical yuppies.”
“My husband and I can live happily on very little, but now that we have kids we want them to have the advantages of a good school system, a safe place to live, and enough money to handle medical emergencies. What’s responsible and what’s luxury?”
This “simple lifestyle” stuff can sound great in theory but be anything but simple in the very day living of it. In fact, it can cause guilt, conflict, resentment, and self-righteousness. So why don’t we just give it all up and enjoy the good life? Perhaps because we take seriously the motto “Live simply so that others can simply live.” Over the years, my husband and I have struggled with many of the above situations and offer the following snippets of wisdom as part of the ever evolving discussion on children, money, and values.
1. Simple lifestyles need not mean living in destitution, but we must never be so isolated from the poor that we fail to be touched by their pain.
For example, if our own neighborhood is not poor, can we find ways to come into face to face contact with people who have less than us.
2. People are more important than things.
If we have a choice between protecting a possession and protecting a relationship, the person comes first. For example, buying a house, car, etc., should not be at the expense of time needed for the family.
3. Start young.
It’s a lot easier to maintain a modest lifestyle if that’s how the children have grown up. For example, if the policy at the grocery store has always been no trinkets, it’s easier than backing off from these treats later.
4. Seek a balance.
If parents are perceived as scrooges, children may resent having a thrifty lifestyle forced upon them and rebel to the opposite extreme. An occasional splurge is good for the soul and can let your kids know you’re human. For example, although we don’t typically buy expensive brand-name clothes for our children, sometimes we’ve made an exception if it was a quality item, just to break our image as tightwads.
5. Hang around with people with values like yours.
One of the hardest things for a parent is the concern that their child will suffer by not having something important that their peers have. It’s easier to say “no” to a purchase when you can point out friends who have similar family standards.
6. What about Allowances?
A modest amount of regular spending money can help the child learn the value of money and have the power to get things the parents might think are frivolous. The child then learns his/her own lessons about what is worth buying without the parent preaching.
7. Gift-giving criteria.
Encourage the giving of gifts that are creative and may not cost money. The gift of one’s effort and time are thus highlighted. Although we have done a lot of coupons for services and craft projects, we also found out the hard way that it’s important to give at least one item that they can unwrap and might be considered a “heart’s desire.”
8. Reduce temptation.
Although children should learn how to say “no” to the consumerism of our society, sometimes it can be so overwhelming that it’s easier to just minimize the commercials seen by limiting TV, and not spend much time in stores.
9. Make the “green movement” an ally.
Although our kids sometimes think this “simple lifestyle stuff” is pretty square, they can get turned on by the environmental ideas of “reduce, reuse, recycle.” Saving mother earth is attractive and in.
10. Favorite personal tip.
We instituted an annual clothing allowance once the kids got to an age that they contested the reasonable and thrifty clothes we bought for them. This took us out of the argument and let them decide whether to blow the whole year’s allowance on a couple pair of popular running shoes or rather to discover the joys of bargains and discount stores. What’s your best tip?
Source: Parenting for Peace and Justice Newsletter, Issue No. 65, December 1994
Why do people pray?
Goal:
To consider some ideas about the nature of prayer.
Preparation:
Read Background for Being With God in Prayer.
Activities:
Introduce the story:
In our Unitarian Universalist church people have many different ideas about God. For some people God is what’s really real, for some God is what’s most important, and for some God is what’s most mysterious. But there are also some UUs who have ideas about what’s most real and most important and most mysterious but they don’t call those things God. They use other words, like Universe, Life, or Love. In our church we each decide for ourselves which words to use and what we believe.
The stories I’m going to read were written to help kids decide for themselves what they thing about God. Here’s one of them.
Read: “Being With God in Prayer.”
Discuss:
What do you do when you have a problem?
Have you ever shared a problem with God? Did you ever get help for a problem in a dream?
What are the 3 things the story suggests we remember about prayer?
Make up a body prayer:
In the story the girl mentioned that she had seen people use their bodies in different ways when they prayed. Have you ever seen this? Let’s try some of the ways we’ve seen other people use their bodies when they pray.
Discuss what it feels like to do these different body motions. Try making up your own body movements to express a prayer. Talk about what you are “saying” with your body.
Background for "The Ten Commandments"
The first five books of the Hebrew Bible include many laws and ordinances, often freely mixed with narrative passages that give the context or reason for the particular law. The Decalogue, or Ten Commandments, probably existed as an independent document before the E writer placed it in his story of Moses. Another almost identical version can be found in Deuteronomy 5, although in Deuteronomy the Sabbath is observed as a re- minder of Israel’s bondage in Egypt, that the slaves of the Israelites "may rest as you do," whereas in Exodus the Sabbath is observed because God rested after six days of the labor of creation.
The form of the Ten Commandments used here is common to most Protestant churches. Unitarian Universalists from other religious traditions may be more familiar with other forms.
The first four commandments refer to the relationship of the Israelites with their god, YHWH. The next six refer to relationships among people. Breaking any of the commandments was a breach in the covenant relationship–the two-way agreement that bound YHWH and Israel together-but the Israelites were told, "If you listen to these laws and are careful to observe them, then the Lord your God will observe the sworn covenant he made with your forefathers and will keep faith with you. He will love you, bless you and cause you to increase" (Deuteronomy 7:12-13a).
The golden calf mentioned in the story is believed by many to have been the central focus of Canaanite worship of this period. An excavation in Israel in the summer of 1990 uncovered the first "golden calf" archaeologists have ever found. Much smaller than the calf described in the story of Moses, it is slightly larger than four inches tall and weighs about a pound. Made of several metals and burnished to provide a golden sheen, the calf is thought to date from about 1550 B.C.E. (Cleveland Plain Dealer, July 25, 1990).
"Why do we light a chalice?"
Around the Church Around the Year by Jan Evans-Tiller
uu&me!, and We Are Many, We Are One by Colleen M. McDonald
Goals:
To learn about the meaning and history of the flaming chalice as a symbol of UUism.
Materials:
For family chalice:
• Poster paint
• Unglazed Flowerpot 4" in diameter
• Unglazed flowerpot saucer 7” in diameter
• Glue
• Votive Candle
For chalice banner
• Cloth (felt, burlap, or muslin) for banner, 40” x 50” and of a light color
• Wooden dowel, 48” long and 1/2” in diameter
• Fancy cord or heavy yarn for hanging banner
• Colored felt or cotton cloth pre-cut into 1” squares. You will need various shades of green for the outer circle; blues, purples, & grays—or earth tones—for the chalice base; reds and oranges, yellows, and golds for the flame.
• Fabric glue
Activities:
1. Read “The Flaming Chalice, Symbol of Unitarian Universalism”
2. Make a family chalice
• Paint the unglazed flowerpot and saucer. You can make them all one color, or put designs on them.
• Use the unglazed flowerpot, upside down, to form the base.
• Glue the saucer right side up to the pot, following the directions for gluing porous materials. It will need a long drying period.
• Place a votive candle in the saucer. It will look like the illustration here.
3. Make a chalice banner
• Print the chalice design here. Enlarge it to trace on the banner cloth, or draw it freehand on the cloth.
• Place the background cloth on a flat surface. Trace or draw design on the cloth.
• Brush glue onto each section of the design and fill in with overlapping pieces of colored cloth.
• When the glue is dry, insert the dowel and fasten the cord or yarn for hanging.
4. Light a Chalice using Words and Motions
5. Do the Flaming Chalice HandShake
God is Like a Father
As Jesus was growing up he Iearned many things about God. He learned that God cared about what happened to people and he learned that God wanted people to care about each other. He also learned that he could talk with God and when he talked to God he called him Father. After Jesus was grown he traveled around the countryside, meeting many people and telling them how God wanted them to care for each other.
One time a large group of people gathered around Jesus and one of them came forward and said, "Jesus, I want to do the things that God wants me to do but sometimes it is hard to know what I am supposed to do. God has given us many rules to follow like: don’t steal, don’t lie, don’t hurt others. But sometimes it’s hard to remember all the rules. Can you tell me an easy way to remember what God wants me to do?" So Jesus spoke to God in the following way, "Father, one of your children wants to know a way to remember all the things you want your people to do. What shall I tell them?"
Then God answered, "Tell them, ‘All those rules really mean one simple thing: Love each other." And so that was what Jesus told them.
But one of the people said to Jesus, "Must we love everybody, even people who are different from us?" Jesus spoke to God again, "Father, they want to know if they must love people who are different."
And God answered, "Tell them, ‘Every one of you is different and special but you are all my children and I love each one of you and I want you to love each other,"’ And so that was what Jesus told them.
The people who came to talk with Jesus noticed that he talked to God. They asked him to teach them how to talk with God. So Jesus spoke to God again and said, "Father, your children want to know how to talk with you. What shall I tell them?"
God then answered, "Tell them to talk with me in prayer." And so that was what Jesus did. He taught the people a prayer like the following:
Father, blessed is your name
May we learn to love each other
May a world of love come to be.
Give us this day the things we need
And forgive us for the wrong things we do
As we will forgive others.
Keep us safe from evil.
Amen.
The Healing Cup
Many Unitarian Universalist churches and fiellowships start their worship service on Sundoy morning by lighting a flame inside a chalice. This flaming chalice is a symbol for Unitarian Universalists just as the cross and the Star of David are symbols for other religious groups. The story of how the flaming chalice became our symbol is an interesting one and it begins during the Second World War.
During that war, a lot of people living in Eastern Europe–Unitarians, Jews, and others–were in danger of being put in prison or killed by Nazi soldiers. A group of Unitarians came together in Boston, Massachusetts to form the Unitarian Service Committee and their plan was to help the people in danger from the Nazis. The director of the Service Committee was the Unitarian minister Charles Joy. Rev. Joy had an office in Portugal so he would be near the people he wanted to help. He was in charge of a whole secret group of agents and messengers who worked hard trying to find safe routes for people to escape.
The Rev. Joy and his assistants often needed to ask governments and other organizations for
their help to save people who were in danger. They would send messages to anyone in government who might give them money, transportation, or a safe route. Because they were a new organization though, not very many people had heard of them. This made it much harder for the Unitarian Service Committee to get the help they needed.
In those days during the war, danger was everywhere. Lots of people were running away from their own countries. People who were escaping and people who wanted to help often didn’t speak the same language. The Rev. Joy decided it would be much better if they had an official symbol, or picture to help identify members of the Unitarian Service Committee. With a picture or symbol, language didn’t matter.
An Artist helps
The Rev. Joy needed an artist. He went to a very talented man for help. His name was Hans Deutsch, and he had escaped from the Nazis in Paris, France, where he was in danger because he drew cartoons showing people how evil the Nazis were. The Rev. Joy asked Deutsch to create a symbol to print on their papers to make them look important. We wanted the symbol to impress governments and police who had the power to help move people to safety.
The Healing Cup
Deutsch borrowed an old symbol of strength and freedom from Czechoslovakia–a chalice with a flame. The Rev. Joy wrote to his friends in Boston that the new symbol seemed to show the real spirit of the Unitarian religion. It showed a chalice, or cup, for giving a healing drink of helpfulness and sacrifice. And so the flaming chalice became the symbol of the Unitarian Service Committee.
Many years later, the flaming chalice became the symbol of Unitarian Universalist groups all over the world. By the early 1970s, enough Unitarian Universalists had heard the story of the flaming chalice symbol that they began to light a flaming chalice as part of the worship service. Over the years, this practice has spread over most of the United States and Canada.
What does it mean to have a symbol like this? Well, one thing it means is that wherever you see a flaming chalice, you know that there are Unitarians and Universalists nearby. Having a symbol also can remind you of what’s most important to you.
Truth Wins
One very old woman told how the flaming chalice of her homeland, Czechoslovakia, helped her while she was in a Nazi prison camp. Printed under the picture of the Czech flaming chalice was the motto "Pravda vitezi," which means, in English, "truth overcomes," or "truth prevails." Every single morning in that terrible camp, the old woman said, she traced a picture of a flaming chalice in the sand with her finger. Then she wrote the motto underneath it. "It gave me the strength to live each day," she said. Whenever she drew the chalice in the dirt she was reminded that some day the world would remember the important truth that every single person is important and should be free to think and believe as he or she chooses.
When we see the chalice lit at the beginning of our service every Sunday, we can enjoy it because it is a lovely thing to do. But we can also remember the story of the flaming chalice and the strength it has given people for hundreds of years. We use it to let others know that Unitarian Universalists believe in helping others.
Sources: UUA website, The History of the Flaming Chalice, and the sermon, OtherPulpits, OtherMinistries by the Rev. Mark Belletini, delivered at the 1999 UUA General Assembly.
Background for Moses in the Bulrushes
All that is known of Moses comes from the Bible and mostly from the book of Exodus, which tells the story of the "going out" of the Israelites from Egypt, of the covenant made with YHWH, and of the tabernacle. The J authors, Z 50 years after the likely time of the events depicted in Exodus, offer the earliest account; the E and P writers build on the J document. Originally, the material in Exodus belonged to four separate traditions, but by the J writers’ time in the 11th century B.C.E., these separate sources had been woven into a common strand.
The stories about Moses reflect an accurate picture of Egypt in the 13th century B.C.E., though much of the material in Exodus is legendary. The best guess of today’s scholars is that the events of Exodus may have taken place from 1290 to 1224 B.C.E., and that the Pharaoh was Ramses II. It would have been customary for nomadic people to be admitted to Egypt in times of famine, and it is known that during this time Ramses II launched vast building projects that needed much slave labor. The number of Egyptian loan-words found in Exodus is another reason to believe in the historicity of the basic story.
Did Moses actually exist? In the oldest section of Exodus, "The Song of Miriam," there is no mention of Moses. On the other hand, it is reasonable to assume that the legends about Moses are based on events in the life of a historic person. Details about him such as his Levite ancestry, his ability to deal with the Egyptians, and the descendants he left support such a belief. Though Exodus 2: 10 infers that the name Moses stems from his being drawn out of the water, most scholars believe it is an Egyptian root word for "to be born." It is found in names such as Tutmose, which means "Tut is born."
The nativity story is similar to other such tales in the Near East and elsewhere in which a king is warned that a child who is about to be born will in some way usurp his power. The king then tries to kill the child, who is saved by the deity and eventually does carry out the fore ordained plan for his life. Elements in this story are similar, for example, to one about the birth of Sargon I of Agade: "… my changeling mother conceived me, in secret she bore me. She set me in a basket of rushes, with bitumen she sealed my lid. She cast me into the river which rose not over me…." (Daiches, Moses: The Man and His Vision, p. 32).
The story of a cruel king who tries to kill a child destined for great things, only to be thwarted in the end, has intrinsic psychological appeal. Children identify with the hero who survives persecution and is eventually able to win the battle against such evils. The question of adoption may bring up special concerns. Though most children have concerns about adoption at one time or another, these issues are especially acute for children who are actually adopted. As you pose the discussion question about adoption, be sensitive to the children’s worries, and invite them to share their feelings. Reassure the children with the thoughts about the biological mother’s difficult but loving choice and the adoptive parents’ commitment, care, and love.
Opening Activity about Prejudice
Opening (10 minutes)
Gather in a circle and light the candle or chalice. Say something like, "At our first session, we talked about racial justice and racism. These were words some of you had never heard. So far we have been doing things to help us understand racial justice, which is about being kind and fair to all people.
"We talked in the last few weeks about the beauty of all the kinds of people in the world, and all the different kinds of families. We can see on the map that our country is composed of people from different parts of the world. We know that there are many different languages and foods. We know that there are many different ways of dressing and playing, and many different ways of seeing the world. We call this diversity, and we cherish our nation’s diversity."
If your congregation has little or no racial diversity, you may want to say something like, "Yet, when we look around us, in our own town, we find that most of our neighbors are the same as we are. Many of our schools and churches have the same people as our neighborhood. When we look around us, we find very few African Americans, Asian Americans, Latin Americans, or Native Americans (or Canadians) in our neighborhoods, churches, and schools. So we don’t have many chances to experience the diversity of our world.
"To understand why we are separated from some of the wonderful diversity of people, we have to understand another hard word, ‘prejudice’. Prejudice is an invisible wall between people. Prejudice keeps African Americans, Asian Americans, Latin Americans, Native Americans, and European Americans (Canadians) apart. Prejudice is a form of racial injustice. Today we are going to learn a little more about prejudice and how it affects us all–even people like you, who may never have heard the word ‘preiudice’ before."
If your congregation is racially diverse, say something like, "We have a wonderful world of diversity in our church, too–a rainbow race with people who are African American, Asian American, Native American, European American, Latin American–just like our city, and our country, and our world.
"Not all churches and schools and towns have a rainbow of people. In many communities in our country, people are separated from each other by color. To understand how this happened, you need to understand a hard word, ‘preiudice’. Prejudice is an invisible wall between people. Prejudice can keep African Americans, Asian Americans, Native Americans, Latina/Latinos, and European Americans apart. Prejudice is a form of racial injustice.
"Today we are going to learn a little more about prejudice and how it affects us all–even people like you, who may not have heard the word brejudice before."
Focusing (10 minutes)
Bring out the snack. Say something like, "Today we are beginning with a snack, Ugli fruit." Hold it up and wait for reactions. Ask questions like, "What is it? Have you ever seen one? Have you ever tasted one? What do you think it tastes like? Do you think you’ll like it?" Pass one or two around and let the children feel and smell the fruit. Encourage reactions from reticent children.
Cut up the fruit. Elicit comments as the children try it. Say something like, "Do you like it? Does it taste like you thought it would? Does it remind you of another fruit? What was your favorite part of snack today? Why?"
Say something like, "Sometimes we don’t think we are going to like something different– a new food, or game, or people who are different from ourselves. But when we taste the food, or play the game, or meet and live with the people, we are glad that we did. We grow when we try new things."
"When you first saw the outside–the skin– of the fruit, you may have thought,’Ugh–I’m not going to eat that!’ That was prejudice–you made up your mind about a new experience without even giving it a chance. If you refused to eat the fruit, you’d only miss out on a piece of fruit. The fruit doesn’t have any feelings; it doesn’t care. But when someone looks at a person and says, ‘I don’t like the color of his skin,’ or,’What funny hair she has!’ and refuses to get to know them or play with them, that’s prejudice, too. When a person develops a prejudice against another person, feelings are hurt, and everyone loses."
Exploring (15 minutes)
Reintroduce the word "prejudice" by writing the first part of the word on a card or newsprint. Say something like, "Today we have been talking about the word ‘prejudice’. It’s a long word, so let’s break it into parts so we can understand it better. ‘Pre’ means before, and ‘judge’ means to give an opinion about something. Add ‘pre’ to what you think, and you are saying what you think about someone or something before you even know that someone or something.
Prejudice means to be unfair to someone before you even know that person. Did anyone pre-judge the fruit? Did you think you wouldn’t like it before you even tried it?
"Have you ever had an experience where someone prejudged you? That is, when someone put you down or wouldn’t let you do something just because you were a girl or a boy, or too young or too small? Have you ever seen someone being unfair to someone else when they didn’t even know them?"
If it is helpful, use an example from your own experience. Use this example if you don’t have another one: "I know someone who started to wear glasses in the first grade. Do you know anyone who started to wear glasses then? Well, she was the only person in her class wearing glasses, and that made her different. What do you think happened to her? First of all, she could see the teacher and the blackboard, and that was good. But some of the other first-graders thought she looked funny, so they called her names and wouldn’t become her friend."
Elicit responses about this instance of prejudice to help the children understand the concept. Expand the discussion to include instances of racial prejudice. Use examples from your own experience or from news articles. Help the children identify the prejudice in each example. Take out some baseball cards. Invite the children to show any cards they have brought in. Point out that professional baseball teams are "rainbow" teams, with players of many colors — black and brown and white (point to appropriate cards).
Say something like, "But did you know that years ago, only whites were allowed to play baseball in the American and National Leagues? That meant that you couldn’t play for the New
York Yankees or the Cincinnati Reds or any other Major League team unless you were white.
What do you think about that?"
Invite responses.
Introduce the story Teammates by saying: "Today we are going to read a true story about real people. It’s about racial prej udice, and about justice and fairness. Let’s see what happened in the history of baseball to give us the rainbow teams we have now."
Read the story and show the illustrations. Invite reactions and discussion.
What are the Ten Commandments?
Goals:
To hear the story of Moses and the Ten Commandments
(for older kids) To examine the rules and responsibilities they experience in their own lives
Activities:
Read Background for the session
Be sure your kids know the meaning of the word repent (to be sorry for something you’ve done)
.
Read the story: “The Ten Commandments”
Discuss:
Which commandment do you think is most important? Why?
Some rules are easy to understand, like “Don’t run out in front of a car.” Others aren’t as obvious, like “Always say thank you when someone gives you something.” If you were starving, do you think you should have to follow the commandment “You shall not steal?” Why?
If you could make up a new commandment of everybody, what would it be?
