People say that time changes us; that with every new experience or event in our lives, we are somehow altered. While I think this is somewhat true, I tend to embrace a different framework. I embrace the idea that time does not change us, but rather unfolds us. This is a saying attributed to Max Frisch. It is a quote that I have hanging in my living room, next to a picture of me and my wife. The picture is of our hands, intertwined in one another, and the ribbons we used in our handfasting ceremony during our wedding service. It is a testament to the nature of our relationship, as a consistently evolving and transformative experience; the openness to love one another, and the potential for unfolding that is inherent within.
This idea of our lives unfolding is the way I think about the concept of transformation. While people can certainly change throughout their lifetimes, it seems that with each passing day, we mostly become more and more who we are. And so it is in marriage, parenting, and any relationship where we are invested and committed. Such relationships help us to go beyond ourselves, and see things from a different perspective. This change in our lens helps us to see our strengths and gifts, and areas where there is room to grow. It seems that at the core of who we are, there is potential for growth and transformation. In each of those relationships, we learn more about ourselves, and the way we are in the world.
Just as a tree takes on different shapes and sizes throughout its lifespan, from seed to sapling, to sturdy oak, so do we as human beings. We are constantly emerging, growing, and changing shape. For many of us, this includes assuming new roles or taking on new responsibilities. Ideally, I suppose these roles would all converge into one and we would be integrated and whole beings. But that is so difficult sometimes!
Often, our roles conflict with one another, or cause tension in our lives or relationships. But even in those moments, there is a potential for growth and unfolding; there is a chance for transformation. We unfold across our lifespan, and grow more into who we are. In those instances, there is also a possibility of transformation for others’ ideas about us and the many roles we hold. The potential for transformation, for learning, and for understanding lies within us and around us. Perhaps the key to such a discovery or development lies in our ability to live the journey and be open to all of the things (good and bad) that we might realize about ourselves. And perhaps the most effective thing we can do is not strive to become someone or something else, or to change who we are, but to let our lives unfold to exhibit the transformation that has taken place.
People say that time changes us; that with every new experience or event in our lives, we are somehow altered. While I think this is somewhat true, I tend to embrace a different framework. I embrace the idea that time does not change us, but rather unfolds us. This is a saying attributed to Max Frisch. It is a quote that I have hanging in my living room, next to a picture of me and my wife. The picture is of our hands, intertwined in one another, and the ribbons we used in our handfasting ceremony during our wedding service. It is a testament to the nature of our relationship, as a consistently evolving and transformative experience; the openness to love one another, and the potential for unfolding that is inherent within.
This idea of our lives unfolding is the way I think about the concept of transformation. While people can certainly change throughout their lifetimes, it seems that with each passing day, we mostly become more and more who we are. And so it is in marriage, parenting, and any relationship where we are invested and committed. Such relationships help us to go beyond ourselves, and see things from a different perspective. This change in our lens helps us to see our strengths and gifts, and areas where there is room to grow. It seems that at the core of who we are, there is potential for growth and transformation. In each of those relationships, we learn more about ourselves, and the way we are in the world.
Just as a tree takes on different shapes and sizes throughout its lifespan, from seed to sapling, to sturdy oak, so do we as human beings. We are constantly emerging, growing, and changing shape. For many of us, this includes assuming new roles or taking on new responsibilities. Ideally, I suppose these roles would all converge into one and we would be integrated and whole beings. But that is so difficult sometimes!
Often, our roles conflict with one another, or cause tension in our lives or relationships. But even in those moments, there is a potential for growth and unfolding; there is a chance for transformation. We unfold across our lifespan, and grow more into who we are. In those instances, there is also a possibility of transformation for others’ ideas about us and the many roles we hold. The potential for transformation, for learning, and for understanding lies within us and around us. Perhaps the key to such a discovery or development lies in our ability to live the journey and be open to all of the things (good and bad) that we might realize about ourselves. And perhaps the most effective thing we can do is not strive to become someone or something else, or to change who we are, but to let our lives unfold to exhibit the transformation that has taken place.
Early on, I grew to love tramping through the woods hunting edible mushrooms. The little depressions filled with pine litter that bloomed after a rain in late summer into a patch of golden chanterelles, the snag that drew woodpeckers seeking sustenance flushing twice a year with the heavy fruit of sulfur shell, the sandy dry patches that bore tiny black trumpets were each and all seasonal treasures of transformation. One wonderful and magical place became yet another. The leaf litter changed to leaf mold and then back to earth and from that once again mushrooms, herbs, and trees grew anew.
Once we harvested those mushrooms, of course, another transformation went on—we washed and cut and cooked them. Those fungi nourished us, changing again. And what we did not eat or could not use went into the compost, to change again to nourishing earth.
Transformation is life, including the transformation that results in death and decay.
Podcast: Download (4.9MB)
Subscribe: More
Forty to one. That’s the ratio of sap to maple syrup in the long, slow process of creating the amber sweetness my family used to boil and bottle every spring. It’s a ratio that tells you something about the time and determination required to make syrup, but it gives no hint of the longer arc of transformation that makes it possible. Read more →
Podcast: Download (2.4MB)
Subscribe: More
If Unitarian Universalism stands for love, it is wed to freedom. Freedom invites vision. Vision leads to change. Change causes anxiety. Anxiety awakens resistance. Abolitionist Frances Ellen Watkins Harper sought freedom from bondage for blacks and suffrage for women. Mary and Joseph F. Jordan sought to free blacks from poverty through education.
Podcast: Download (1.3MB)
Subscribe: More
Let us be dissatisfied until America will no longer have a high blood pressure of creeds and an anemia of deeds.
Let us be dissatisfied until the tragic walls that separate the outer city of wealth and comfort from the inner city of poverty and despair shall be crushed by the battering rams of the forces of justice.
Podcast: Download (1.6MB)
Subscribe: More
“Read it again!” she says,
and again we do. The same
disaster predictably reenacted
night to night. “Don’t go in!” Read more →
Podcast: Download (10.6MB)
Subscribe: More
The year my son turned six we held his birthday party at a neighborhood park. We found a great site right next to the slides, swing, and assorted climbing structures. Read more →
Can you give $5 or more to sustain the ministries of the Church of the Larger Fellowship?
If preferred, you can text amount to give to 84-321
Quest for Meaning is a program of the Church of the Larger Fellowship (CLF).
As a Unitarian Universalist congregation with no geographical boundary, the CLF creates global spiritual community, rooted in profound love, which cultivates wonder, imagination, and the courage to act.